Chapter 13

“What the fu… come on, Khushi. Give me my phone back, now.”

“No!  You promised we would spend our Sunday night watching a movie, but it seems you and your phone are on a date. Alone. For the last hour. So, Nahee nahee nahee.”

Aware that I need to make an escape, I get up at a rapid speed from the couch with his iPhone clutched inside my hand.

“Sweetheart, you’re losing your memory. I said, I would sit with you, while you watch the movie. Plus I have been sitting through these torturous three hour movies for the last few weekends. That too, on a Sunday. And, today,  you won’t even let me fucking touch you. What is a man supposed to do? Now, give me a break.  Come on, be a good girl, and please give me the phone. I was in the middle of texting Aakash about the financial meeting tomorrow.”

Having no intentions of giving his prized possession back, I shove the phone in my pocket, and step back. As he stands up from the couch coming close to me, I decide to let him know my stance.

“You are mistaken. It’s you, who is losing their memory. And I am not letting you touch me, because then neither of us gets to watch the movie. What’s the sense of having this state of the art media room, if you’re not going to utilize it?”

After coming to the Penthouse for the first time a few weeks ago, we had decided to spend our Sunday nights after dinner watching a movie. The penthouse has a media room that includes a massive screen with a movie projector, and an array of leather couches organized on different platforms similar to a movie theatre.  The room is painted a dark color with the ceiling painted black and dotted with crystal sparkling lights that give you the illusion of stars. I had fallen in love with this room when he showed it to me. It was then that we decided to make an effort, when possible, to watch a movie.

But it seems he’s not in the mood today. After the last couple of times hardly watching the screen, I had put a no touching rule in place. My cheeks still turn a fiery red thinking about the intimacy we shared in this room.

There’s no time to think further as he is slowly approaching me.

“I don’t care, now come on… hand it over.”

I shake my head, and run out of the room before he comes towards me.

“Seriously, are you going to make me chase you around?”

He swiftly follows me into the hall, but there is no way I will allow him to come near me, as I make a mad dash towards the living room. The couch serves as a barrier between us.

I noticed an amused glint in his eyes, as his lip slightly curves at the corner of his mouth.

“Yes, I am going to make you run after me for this damn phone that you are always glued to.  Waise, don’t your thumbs hurt from all the tick, tick, tick?”

“It looks like someone is jealous of my phone. Sweetheart, you don’t need to be. Come here, and I will give you my undivided attention.”

He throws me an audacious wink, before taking slow steps around the sofa.

“Um… I don’t think so… not tonight…”  I stutter going towards the kitchen, but his darkened gaze is focused on only one thing. Me. His prey.

“Did you really just say not tonight?  Well, we will see about that…”

I quickly bolt out of the kitchen towards the dining room, as he also picks up his pace.

“Baby, I can out run you any day…” The adrenaline rushes through me making my way around the dining table watching him follow my every move.

“You might be able to run more than me, but remember I am faster.” In a matter of seconds, his words prove to be true, as he lunges at me, grasping my hand in his.

“Gotcha! Where are you going to go now?”  He asks, pulling me up against him, locking my hand behind my back.

“Arnav, let me go.”  I moan, trying to get out of his tight grip.

“Oh, I am never letting you go.”

My eyes stare into his, as my heart skips a beat hearing the conviction in his tone. He has me captive with his penetrating gaze searing through my soul.

A sudden gasp escaped my mouth, as he places his hand on the back of my head pulling it towards his, until his lips are mere inches from mine.

“Movie time is over.”  His husky voice whispers before capturing my lips in a consuming passionate kiss, weakening my knees. But then he abruptly draws back. “Not so fast, sweetheart. It’s time for us to go to the bedroom, and call it a night.”

He bends down and puts his one arm around my legs with the other going around my waist, lifting me up. I can’t help but shriek as he carries me over his shoulder making his way to the bedroom.

“Arnav…”  I whine, hitting his back several times, which makes him halt in his tracks.

I try to lift my head to look up, but he pushes me up higher onto his shoulder.  His hand runs up from my thighs to my bottom, and then he begins to caress it gently.  His fingers spreading across my cheeks before his hand comes down against my behind.

“Ouch… that hurt!”  My hands clutch his t-shirt, as he continues walking towards the bedroom.

“Good, that was for not giving me my phone, and now see what I do to you for making me sit through that movie without letting me touch you.  I can’t believe you wanted me to watch a movie with at least twenty songs! Here we are…”

He drops me in the middle of the bed, climbing on top of me. As much as I attempt to pull myself up, I fail. His weight straddles me down forcing me to stay firmly in place. I feel my heart racing, gazing at the intensity in his eyes which seems to be locked on my breast.

His hands make their way inside my shirt, slowly caressing my waist then cupping my mounds in the palm of his hand. But he quickly pulls his hand out, before lifting my shirt and looks down stunned with his mouth open. I can’t help but smirk at his reaction.

“Am I dreaming?” His blinks, then shakes his head in disbelief. His heated gaze stares down at my breast, as I feel my body shiver anticipating his touch.

“It looks like you actually took my advice, not wearing a bra to bed. I approve of this new bold Khushi. My Khushi.”  He whispers into my ears.

The possessiveness in his tone, makes my heart pick up its pace. His hands caress my neck leaning down on me.

“I couldn’t have you ripping another one of my bras, again… could I?”

His gaze darkens at my response, then drops down as he molds my breast inside his hands. I shiver at his touch, pulling his face close towards me. We both stare at each other, as his thumb strokes my hardened peak, leaving me breathless. I part my lips inviting him to take them.  But the devil shakes his head, and smiles.

“Not so fast…” He leans down, and kisses the back of my neck before gently sucking down. I close my eyes, holding my breath as his touch spreads like fire throughout my body.

But that comes to a halt, as we are interrupted hearing the shrill ringing coming from the phone.

“Damn phone…”  He bites out in annoyance, and then gets off of me lying besides me.

“At least now, you won’t need to take a cold shower.”  I smile at him, taking both of our phones out of my pocket.

Looking at them, I am surprised to see that it’s mine that’s ringing. I decide to hand him his phone before sitting up.

“It’s my parents, they never call at this time. I wonder what’s wrong.”  I glance up at him, and he urges me to pick up the phone holding onto my hand.

“Titaliya…”

“Babuji is everything okay?”  I get concerned hearing my father’s low voice.

“Everything is fine, your Amma wanted to Skype so she can see you. Ever since she woke up this morning she has been worried about you. She is feeling anxious that something is wrong, and you might be in trouble.  You know how easily she gets worried about you. Maybe if you talk to her she will calm down, are you asleep, bitiya?”

Shit… how can I Skype from here without them finding out I am not at home? That too on a Sunday night at almost eleven o’clock.  I hate doing this to them. I have no choice, but to lie.

“Can we please Skype tomorrow morning?  I was just about to go to sleep, since I have a busy work week ahead.  And, there is nothing to worry about, I am perfectly fine. Babuji, let me speak with her, that might help.”

As I wait for my mother to get on the phone, Arnav kisses my hand before leaving the room to give me privacy.

I can’t help but sigh, hearing my mother’s panicked voice come through the phone.

“Khushi, are you sure you are okay?  Is anything wrong or did you get hurt? My bacha, please tell me the truth.”

“Amma, please relax. There is nothing wrong.  Devi Maiya ki kasam, I am fine.  Actually, I am truly very happy here, just like you wanted. This place is helping me move forward. My job is going great, plus I have made some friends. And, you know I also have Anjali, and her family. So, there is no need to worry about me.”

“But that’s not enough, is it? How long is this going to go on? I don’t like you being alone there in that big city. You know I haven’t pushed this topic, but it’s time now. It’s been over two months since you moved to New York. You need to settle down, and have someone in your life. How can you expect me not to worry when you are so far away from me, all alone… tell me?”

It breaks my heart, hearing the anguish in my mother’s voice as she breaks down. I know she means well, and is looking out for me. This immediately makes me feel guilty hiding my relationship with Arnav.

“Amma, don’t cry. I will do as you say, but for now I still need some time… can’t you please give me that?” I plead, as I swallow the lump in my throat with tears brimming in my eyes.

I can hear my father calming her down, and taking the phone away.  But my heart aches, as I can still hear her crying in his arms.

“Titaliya, please don’t get upset. Your Amma is just emotional right now. I will speak with her. You go, and get some sleep. It’s late for you. We love you, Khushi…”

The obvious pain in his voice makes me feel like I have failed as a daughter. I take a deep breath fighting back the tears, not wanting to upset them more than they already are.

“I love you both too, and I miss you very much.  I promise to Skype in the morning.”

As I put the phone on the nightstand, my eyesight blurs with the tears that I have been holding back. I quickly rush inside the bathroom locking the door behind me, not wanting Arnav to see me like this.

After turning on the water in the sink, I collapse on the floor letting the tears stream down my face.

Why is this happening now?

After such a long time I am feeling like myself, happy and carefree.

So, why am I holding back expressing my true feelings about Arnav?

The past month has been fulfilling in so many ways. It’s him that has brought the Khushi in me, making me feel alive. I have found myself again, someone that had been lost, and living according to what others wanted.

If only my parents were able to see me now, they would genuinely be happy.

Telling them would mean taking this relationship to the next level. But, are we ready for that?

The past few weeks, our relationship has grown both emotionally and physically.  The understanding and communication we both share, has really helped us to connect with one another. Whether it’s personal or work related.  Though we haven’t crossed the line physically our intimacy has been intense as we continue to explore it further. Without words he has understood my limitations for now. It hasn’t been easy to control ourselves, but one of us comes always to our senses. I look over at the shower, and can’t help but smile remembering the numerous times he has taken a cold one.

Since we exchanged keys to our places, we have taken advantage of visiting each other. Due to our busy work schedules, it’s hard to find time during the day. So, the alternative has been spending a couple of nights together during the weekdays, either at his place or mine.  Even our weekends have consisted of us taking out time to do something around the city, and staying over.

This relationship is moving perfectly, at the pace we have set.

Is it time now to move it further?

I am afraid, once our families find out, they will push to move this forward straight to the mandap.

During our last couple of visits to Anjali’s home, I have noticed the way the family has tried to put us together, including Nani. The subtle hints, sending us out to pick up something, making us sit together, and the comments, have been noticed by the both of us. There is no doubt they will approve of our relationship.

But, what if Arnav is not ready?

Am I ready to voice out how I really feel?

There are some things that we still need to work through. Or is it just me being afraid?

“Khushi, are you okay?” He asks, standing outside the bathroom door.

“Yes, I am fine. I will be right out.” I quickly rinse my face, but that doesn’t clear up my red eyes. And to my luck there are no eye drops in the cabinets.

Damn it, now he’ll definitely notice that I have been crying.

A few minutes later when I walk out of the bathroom, I am grateful when I see him sitting on the sofa with his laptop.

“Are you working?”

“Yes.”

Taken aback with his clipped one word response, I look over at him to find him watching my every move. But I turn my back to him climbing into bed, and lie down drawing the comforter tightly over me.

“You might want to check your phone, while you were in the bathroom for the last twenty minutes, your father called, and texted.”

He approaches the bed with his laptop, and hands me my phone.

In fear of getting emotional from speaking, I nod, taking the phone from him. I watch as he settles down on the bed opening up his laptop, and continues to work.

Thankfully the text from my father is letting me know my mother is fine now, and asking me not to worry. Feeling a bit relieved, I send a quick reply, and then put the phone away.

For a few moments, neither one of us says anything. There is an eerie silence that fills the room. It’s quite unnerving, since bedtime consists of lying in each other’s arms and talking till one of us falls asleep. Though it’s me mostly doing the talking, but having him engaged in the conversation makes it livelier.

I take a deep breath, and look up at him. But he seems to be occupied with work.

“Just so you know, there is a solution to your problem.” He states in a rather matter of fact manner, catching me off guard.

“And, what do you know about my problem?  Please explain it to me, since clearly I don’t know. Only if you are not busy with work…” I sit up, and lean back against the headboard.

He sighs, and closes his laptop placing it on the nightstand before facing me.

“Let’s get one thing straight, I am never busy with work, when it comes to you. Keep that in mind, the next time you want to throw that at my face. Do you think I don’t know what’s going on? Khushi, you were in the bathroom crying, don’t even deny it. Then you come out without even looking at me, and then get in the bed. Since when did we start doing that? I waited for you to say something, but since you decided not to… I will start.” He pauses for seems like an eternity. “So… are you ready to talk?”

I close my eyes, looking away from him, aware he is not going to like what I have to say.

“There is nothing to talk about. This is my problem. One I need to solve. Myself.”

“Oh really. Is this how you are going to deal with it?” He waits for a response, but I don’t know what to say. “You know what Khushi… I am not backing down on this. This involves us, so you are not going to handle this alone. We can sit here, and argue all night long or we can talk through this. Take your pick.”

He leans back against the headboard, and takes my hand in his.

Why won’t he just let this go, and let me deal with this?

For a few moments, silence fills the room, as neither one of us is ready to back down.

I look down at our entwined hands, this simple action has always made me feel close to him. And, if I am being honest to myself it has also signified that he will always be with me.

Why am I pushing him away?

I move closer to him, leaning my head against his shoulders. He tilts his head down placing a kiss on my forehead, then placing our hands against his chest.

“Arnav, I don’t want us to argue… but…”

He speaks up before I can say anything further.

“Then let’s not, this conversation was bound to happen one of these days. I tried bringing this up last weekend when we were on our way home from Di’s… but you changed the topic. So, I didn’t push it. Khushi, you need to tell your parents about us. This will solve your problem. You won’t have to lie to them if we are together, and I am guessing it might make them feel better.  It’s rather simple.”

“But it’s not simple. What will I tell them? That I am in a relationship with my boss. Then what? Oh, tell them we also spend some of our nights together either at his place or mine. Do you have any idea what my mother will do? Hai Devi Maiya… yup that’s what she will keep chanting, then immediately call the pandit to fix our wedding da…” I stop myself from saying anything further, knowing I have already said more than I should have.

“Then perhaps I need to call Mrs. Gupta myself, at least she will move this relationship further than the daughter. I knew I liked that woman even without meeting her for a reason.”

“Do you think this is a joke?  Arnav, I am serious, right now it’s been between us, but once people find out this will get complicated.  What is everyone going to think?”

“That we are in a relationship…so what? It doesn’t matter what others think, this is about us. As for whose opinion matters, that’s of our families.  And, both of our families will be extremely happy that we are together. I really don’t see the problem here.”

“How do I make you understand?  This is not that easy.” Running my hand through my hair, I get out of the bed. I know his gaze is on me, but I turn away walking over to the window to look out at the strikingly lit city.

“Why isn’t it?  I don’t know about you, but I am serious about this relationship.  This isn’t a fling for me, it never was.  I want us to be together, and not have to sneak around.  I want you to be with me every night, us living under the same roof.  What is it going to take for you to move ahead with me, rather than behind me?”

I turn around surprised, as he approaches me, and stands close to me.  Looking into his eyes, I see nothing but determination.

“How can you think I am not serious about this relationship, I am. I wouldn’t be here with you, if I wasn’t. But, we still need to work on our relationship- not to mention how this will affect us at AR once it’s out in the open that I am dating my boss. Why can’t you see that?”

He turns to face me, and then takes both my hands in his.  There is a glimmer in  his eyes that I haven’t seen before, which holds me captive. A slow smile curves his lips, as he comes closer wrapping his arms around my neck.

“Khushi, do you know what I see?  I see in you my present, and my future. I have known about you for almost a half a year now.  Ever since I heard about Khushi Kumari Gupta, I have been intrigued. Yes, initially it was about getting you hired from a professional aspect, but then when I first met you, there was an instant connection- an attraction that I never felt before with anyone. The last couple of months with you, I have had a glimpse of what life would be with you by my side at work, and home.  It makes me crave for more… the attraction, intimacy, and passion we have shared now goes beyond lust. The only reason why I am able to control myself is because you mean so much to me. I have been asking myself why for the last few of weeks, and it just hit me.”

He takes a deep breath, and leans his forehead against mine, as my heartbeat goes haywire at what he has just admitted to me. As he caresses the side of my face, I lean in closer.

“I’ve finally found the answer I have been searching for. The reason my heart beats faster when you are around, or why it feels empty when you’re not with me, the fact that you are always on my mind, is because I am in love.”

He takes my hand is his, placing it against his chest, and my heart stops beating altogether.

“I love you, Khushi.”   

I look at our hands on his chest, and then back up at him trying to fight away the tears that are threatening to fall.

He shakes his head, and wipes away the lone tear that had escaped with his thumb before taking me into his arms. I pull him closer, holding onto him tightly as the tears surrender and trail unchecked down my cheeks.

Love.

He loves me.

The word that I have been afraid to voice out loud in fear it might be taken away.

“Sweetheart, please stop crying. I can’t see you like this.”

He pulls away, and smiles looking down at me before wiping the tears away. I close my eyes as he pushes loose strands away from my face.

He leans down, and takes my lips in a slow, gentle kiss. I respond by deepening the kiss, winding my arms around his neck, and pull him closer wanting more.

I find myself not wanting to let go, as we pull away for much needed air.  As he pulls away, he places a kiss on my cheek, and then kisses me gently on the lips.

He takes me his arms, and we looking at the glistening lights of the city that are shimmering along with the stars.

“Arnav.”

“Khushi, you don’t need to say anything.  Not yet, at least. I know you need time.  We can work through whatever it is that is bothering you later. But, for now we should get some sleep?”

Before I can say anything, he holds his hand out to me, and I place my hand in his. He pulls me closer to him, and lifts me up in his arms, carrying me to the bed.

He turns off the lights, and then settles down next to me, pulling the cover over the both of us.  He takes me into his arms pulling me closer to his chest, and I wrap my arms tightly around him.

A few moments later, my eyes close on their own accord, as sleep takes over.

But, I wake up when I feel a gentle kiss on my forehead, and I smile to myself as I hear him whisper.

“I love you, sweetheart. And I know you love me, too.”

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